7 mistakes people make at work and how to change that

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Do you drive yourself to prove that you are a good person because you want to gain the approval of others?

So many of us do so don’t feel alone…..

Here are 7 mistakes people make at work:

  • Trying so hard
  • Working after hours
  • Taking work home
  • Saying yes to every request even if you know a fellow colleague who could do the assignment
  • Taking the blame for others’ mistakes
  • Being a “good girl” or “good boy”
  • Feeling hurt when you get moaned at and then berating yourself on top of that

Let’s look at how to rectify these situations:

Trying so hard to please
Yes of course you must work hard otherwise your boss may not value your contribution to the firm but do you have to try so hard to please his or her every whim?  Do you find yourself doing more than is necessary and then feeling resentful afterwards?  Do your best within the boundaries of your job.  Be the best that you can be which doesn’t mean bending over backwards if gymnastics is not your forte.  If you find yourself ironing your boss’s shirts when your job description doesn’t call for it, then maybe this area is a problem for you.

Working after hours
Every so often when pressure mounts it is in good form to work after hours.  But are you working late every day to prove how loyal and dedicated you are?  What you are really doing is building up piles of resentment when your boss starts taking advantage of your benevolence.  You probably ask yourself why you keep doing it and thinking it would “look bad” to stop now when you’ve been doing it for so long.  Work after hours when it is needed, the rest of the time go and do what you need to do in your own life.  If you are always the last to leave, ask yourself why?

Taking work home
Same as above.  You are not a superhero although you may wish to appear like one, so take work home when there’s hectic pressure at work but don’t make a habit of it.  Nobody ever said on their deathbed (although I don’t have proof for this) “I wish I had worked more”.  No!  They wish they had spent more time with the people they love.

Saying yes to every request
You know how you really want your boss to be happy with you so you keep saying yes and the piles of work keep adding up?  You find you can’t actually get to everything no matter how hard you try.  You fear he or she is going to think you are useless at your job.  If the work is too much for one person to handle, think of a colleague who would be able to do that task just as well as you can.  Stop worrying that he or she may do it better than you for fear that this will show you up.  If they do it better than you, that’s one more task you can tick off your list because they will be asked next time as well.  Your boss will thank you for it when you get your other work done and your colleague also gets their work done.  It’s a win-win situation really.

Taking the blame for others’ mistakes
Why?  Let people take responsibility for their own mistakes.  On the odd occasion if your department’s “life depends on it” then fine, but otherwise…. NO!

Being a “good girl” or “good boy”
The need to be “good” is derived from our childhood.  Getting into trouble when we were kids was probably normal for most of us.  But the fear of that still drives many of us to be “good” all the time – don’t step out of line.  However, it’s not good for your health if you never speak up.  If something is unreasonable at work and you don’t speak up about it, notice how your throat area feels?  (tight / like there’s a lump in it / blocked / coughing / thyroid).  If keeping quiet is your default behaviour it could affect your health in the long term.  If you need to speak up but aren’t sure how to go about it, get advice.

Beating yourself up
So, you made a mistake.  Hopefully it didn’t incur a loss of millions.  Seriously, I hope it didn’t.  If it didn’t and you accidentally did something wrong, then sitting there calling yourself names (stupid / idiot / useless / incapable / unworthy / not good enough) is not going to fix the problem.  All it is going to do is mess with your self confidence which makes making more mistakes a possibility.  Forgive yourself – after all, you didn’t do it on purpose!  Then find a way to sort out the problem, possibly own up to it or get some intra-office support to sort it out.  You are human and most likely a good one at that.

Working on these seven tips will hopefully improve your time at work and outside of work.

What other areas do you struggle with at work or out of work?  I would love to hear from you.

I wish you well.

Eve

 


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Nothing happened!

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writerQuestion 1:  If you didn’t have to worry about money what type of work would you do?

I know a great person with creative ideas who loves books and knows he has an amazing book inside him just waiting to come out but he hasn’t written one page!

I would like to win a million rand in the lottery but I hardly ever buy a ticket.

When we think and think and think about doing something but don’t act on it – NOTHING HAPPENS.

Question 2 … Is it something you could actually do?

What is stopping you?  Are you thinking that you could never do it?  Are you thinking that you are not good enough?  Not worthy?  Incapable of ever being a success?

Now that I’m in my late 40’s I’m finding more and more that I want to do things that I haven’t ever acted on.  I’m saving up for those singing lessons.  But let me tell you that when I do start to take those  lessons I have actually no care about if I will ever “succeed” in the eyes of others.  I’m not trying to be a famous singer, I just want to learn the skill and breathe well and have fun.  I want to sing for me.

I do hope that great man writes his first page of his novel, and then the next and then the next.  He doesn’t have to make millions out of it, that’s not the point.  The point is to say to himself “I did what I always dreamed I would do”.

Don’t think, think, think and think that you can’t do it or it couldn’t happen for you.  What’s life for if not to experience?

Live as if money isn’t an object when it comes to starting to realise your dreams.  If money is tight right now and you’ve always wanted to be an artist, buy a pencil and a drawing pad and start.  Or paint with one or two colours of ink using a cotton bud.  Don’t let your inhibitions and self judgement stop you.   If you want to be a tennis player but can only afford one lesson a month, find a teacher who will accommodate you and practise against your garden wall.

So what if you don’t become the next world champion….. just be a champion to yourself for starting.

With love

Eve


 

Click here for a step up towards your dream…….

 

Friction happens

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stormConflicts happen when we act or speak without thinking.  If we had to stop for a moment and consider what we are about to do or say or take a few deep breaths and cool down first there would probably be a lot more peace in our lives and in the world.

Some things you can do

  • Stop.
  • Breathe.
  • Take some time to cool off.
  • Think about what’s really going on for you.
  • Ask yourself: how important is it that I pursue this? Will I remember it in five years time?
  • Look at the part you are playing in the whole scenario because it takes two to tango.
  • What are you looking for in this relationship?
  • Ask yourself if you could handle this in a different way?
  • Then, act – with purpose and coming from a position of creating a peaceful environment.relationships - peace

 Often it’s simply about saying too much too soon.

So… Next time (because there will be a next time)

  • Make some space to listen and hear the other person out.
  • Ask yourself: What is the purpose that I want for this relationship? If you look at that, you will probably want it to be different, most likely better.
  • Think “peace”.
  • Then Act.

When you think before you act or speak you will most likely stand in your own power and be more satisfied with the results.

Try it next time, I know I’m going to.

With love

Eve

 


Just a reminder that the
early bird special for the
Power of Purpose
ends on Tuesday 19 July
(that’s next week) – click here


If you are interested I have included this
5 minute video clip from Oprah Winfrey,
“Whatever follows I am will come looking for you”.
Click here to watch.

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Empowered Difference

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self esteem - individualityIt’s seems tough to be different.  Different means standing out.  It means taking a stand on what you believe in and it can hurt.  Some people think that their difference is not worthy to be out-standing.  They hide in the background or try to blend in, hiding their inner selves, their essence, their values, their beauty.

But did you know that even though you are a human like the rest of the humans milling about, you are useful, capable, beautiful, amazing in your own way and if you let that inner light shine outwards, you will be able to light up others who need it too.  Not only that but when you start to use your difference for something worthwhile, you will feel empowered and strong.  You will forget why you ever thought that hiding your inner beauty was a good idea in the first place.

By the way, you are different but so is every single person in this world.  There is no one who is the same as another.  Even identical twins are different.

So in essence we are all the same.

There’s no sense in hiding now is there?

With love

Eve


The Power of Purpose Aug Sept 2016