Worthy of Receiving

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receiving sarkGiving is super important and gives purpose to one’s life.  However, some people perceive that to receive from others is wrong or they don’t like it.  Have you heard people saying “I would rather give than receive”?

There’s a balance to giving and receiving.  If you constantly give and never allow yourself to receive you are creating an unbalanced relationship with whoever is trying to give to you.  Everyone needs to give in order to feel that they are contributing to society, to friends, relatives and to their intimate relationships and you are giving someone an opportunity to be generous when you are able to accept from others.

Receiving can be scary but hear this….. accepting a gift, a compliment or help, doesn’t mean you are weak or useless, helpless or incapable.  It means you are in a relationship.  You can be strong and still accept from others. Receiving might also bring up feelings of obligation and owing.  i.e. I have to be grateful to this person and now I am indebted or owe them something.  Yes you probably should be grateful, so what?  Someone out there is grateful for what you have done for them too.

You know who else you need to receive from?  Yourself.

The other day I proved it to myself after hearing a talk on this.  After the talk, I gave myself three gifts, one was tasty, one was about cooling down in the boiling heat and the other was taking a few minutes just to enjoy these two things.  When my husband and kids got home later I had so much more energy and willingness to do things for them rather than feeling depleted and put upon with all their needs because I had already given to myself.  I had shown myself that I am worthy of receiving.  It’s weird but I actually wanted to give more because my needs had already been met.  The people around me were naturally happy too.

Did you know you are worthy of love just as you already are with no improvements?  That means that right now you are worthy of love just because you are.

Remember that.

receiving sark 2Next time somebody gives you a compliment, say thank you (instead of not believing them or making excuses or brushing them off).  If somebody offers you help, don’t think “I can do this all on my own”.  Even if you can do it all on your own, it’s okay to share your burdens and your chores.  If somebody gives you a gift, don’t think “oh no, now I have to give them a gift back” just accept it and appreciate that someone cared about you.

Thank you for reading my blog – that is a gift to me.

With love
Eve

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Self Care Box

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self care boxLife seems so busy lately.  I typed this around midnight last night because I didn’t have a chance to do it earlier in the day.  I even fell asleep while typing.

After working on my website, helping out a friend, shopping and lift schemes, I put supper on the stove and felt exhausted.  I knew that what I needed most was to lie down but did I have the time?  It was 7:30 p.m.

I realised that what I needed most at that moment was self care.  This is something I am learning to do for myself more and more.  Putting others first is my default.

So I switched off the lights (and weirdly enough the dogs stopped wrestling), lay down, closed my eyes and just breathed for 10 minutes.

Afterwards I showered and felt so much better. By the time I went to check on the food it was ready.

What I see from the women in my life is that they are always doing for others and hardly ever take time to do for themselves**.  I know that I can still be up late at night, letting the pets out and waiting for them to come back inside, locking up, checking on the kids, making sure all the lights are off etc. while everyone else has been sleeping for over an hour already.

I don’t know what you are like when you don’t give yourself enough self care but I can get irritable, resentful, hungry for junk food, tired, fed up.

So here’s a cool and ready-to-use idea to remind you about self care when you find you need it.

Create a Self Care Box which is  box of things which make you feel loved and nurtured.

grunge texture, distressed funky backgroundThese are some things that I would put in my box.  Personalise your own.

  • A list of all the things you can do for yourself when you feel tired or crabby (e.g. have a bath, lie down, go for a walk, play with the pets, dance to your favourite song, lie under a tree, walk on the grass, etc.).
  • A favourite book that you like dipping into
  • Aromatherapy oil
  • A soft piece of fabric or a plush toy that you like to touch
  • Hand cream
  • A small chocolate
  • Bath salts
  • Face mask
  • A journal with perhaps some writing prompts
  • A pen and drawing equipment
  • Some favourite photos
  • Positive affirmations
  • A USB drive with photos and videos and/or music
  • An inspirational coffee mug
  • A hot water bottle
  • Cotton socks
  • Headphones
  • A tea bag
  • A crystal
  • Tissues
  • A phone number of someone you can call for support

Keep the box somewhere where you can see it.  Open it whenever you feel a bit down or irritable or out-of-kilter or once a day!  Most of the time you will find that just doing something caring for yourself even if it’s for 15 minutes will go a long way to changing your mood and your energy.

You are valuable and worthy of self care and time for yourself.
With love
Eve

**To my male readers, let me know if this is different for you. 

p.s. I’ve updated my website, I would love it if you would have a look.